Wednesday, February 4, 2015

About 1 per day

I'm going at about a rate of one little house per day, but it's not easy.  My physical health is quite poor and it's difficult to recite.  The improvements are very clear and positive.  When I first moved into the house I'm in now, it was a living nightmare.  I could hear other voices and my health was so poor that I did not think I would be around for very long.  In fact, last year I had several consecutive dreams that told me "you may have only a year left [of your life]".  After I attended the local Tibetan Buddhist center (and began being an active participant), many miraculous things happened.  I attended the Dalai Lama's birthday celebration last year and during that event the voices stopped.  It was amazing and wonderful.  Many other wonderful events have happened, but it has been a nearly unbearable struggle despite these positive events.  I feel like I have one foot here and one foot in the spirit world- when I really need to have both feet firmly planted here.  But still, that's an improvement.  Last year at this time, I had two feet in the spirit world and I was suffering terribly.  I couldn't recite little houses at all, I had very little physical or mental energy.  So I am so grateful that I have been able to recite so much and I really just have to be grateful despite the long odds at my recovery.  There are different types of recovery and I have recovered in more ways that one, maybe not in the way that I hoped yet.  Hang in there, Cam...

No comments:

Post a Comment